Vacation

Right now the girls are ending the first week of their six-week vacation. So far the vacation has been more stressful than when the girls are in school, due to altered sleeping patterns and the inability to think of anything to do that doesn't involve a plug. The plus side is that the Little One is loving having her sisters with her all the time.

I have planned my holiday getaway on the premise of getting as far away from people as I can, therefore I have booked a bed in a hostel in a remote village in Austria. I plan on sitting around reading all day, and mayhap hiking a few times. Maybe I'll talk to people. Maybe I won't. I'm starting to get excited about it, especially getting to ride a train across two borders! Should be fun. I'll probably have some stunning pictures when I get back, so get ready. Only 32 days to wait!

Cheers,
Abby:-)

A Letter

Dear One,

You say you love me. I look at you sadly and want to say “No, you don’t.” “Yes, I do!” you would insist, fully believing what you say. “No,” I would return, “I know you don’t really love me because you only say it when I give you what you want. When I punish you and you can look at me and say ‘I love you,’ then you will truly love me.”

I love you. I love you when you are sweet, I love you when you are bitter, I love you when you are happy, I love you when you are angry. When you say “I hate you,” I love you then, too. I pray for you every day that God would grow you into a young woman who longs to glorify Him in everything she does. I see how you care for people and I pray that you would care for them like that all the time, not just when it suits you. You say “That’s not fun, I’m not going to do that,” and I pray that God would give you the strength to do hard, hard things in order to be holy, not just “happy.” Life is so much more than doing what you want and getting what you want. I cannot wait for the day you realize this, for it will change your life.

Love,

Abby

Family

Some days I really miss my sisters. More than usual, that is. I miss the way we can sit up all night talking about stuff and being silly. I miss how I can say almost anything and not feel stupid. I miss the way they look at me like what I say really matters, or at least if it doesn't they want to hear it anyway. I miss being the loud one.

Other days I really miss my brothers. I miss how I can call them any time something breaks. I miss the way they make me laugh until I cry. I miss their man hugs. I miss having them tell me that I'm beautiful. Sometimes I even miss the way they drive me crazy (but not really).

Cloud Castles

Lately I've been dreaming of life after au pair-ing. Mostly the dreams consist of moving to an adorable old apartment in D.C. and setting up house with a container garden on my back porch and a dog. There's a job in there somewhere too, but mostly it's going to church, laying in the sun on the Mall, writing, visiting the same coffee shop every day, and a restaurant once a week. I've always wanted to be a "regular" somewhere.

Pre-Parenting

I'm realizing that one of the most important things about dealing with kids is having a very short-term memory. If I stay angry after an argument with the girls, they stay angry too. If I move on and regain a cheerful attitude, they do as well. I'm not very good at this. I'm good at staying angry.

I've learned at least two lessons over the past four years. The RUF internship taught me that there is life and fellowship outside of my family. Being an au pair is teaching me that there is life and fellowship outside of RUF. What's next?

Going Dutch

  

    The funny thing about the idea that Dutch people are cheap and stingy is that it is completely false. Every time someone here pays for something for me (which happens a lot) they mention the “going Dutch” phrase and laugh about how they aren’t.

    Yesterday I spent the day with some friends in Den Haag. We visited Madurodam, which is a park containing the Netherlands in miniature, at least all the important places. The above miniature of the Queen's house and gardens was my favorite. The gardens alone were about six feet by five in miniature, imagine how big they are in real life!

Joy Comes in the Morning

The day after my last post I learned that my oldest sister had given birth to a beautiful baby boy. I am an aunt! I didn't know I could love someone so much without having ever met them.